Saturday, January 11, 2014

Rainy Night


It was raining out and the street lights were reflected on the wet pavement in neon colors. This was the night she was going to be kissed. It didn’t matter that she felt so insecure, unworthy, not ready. She was going to let the rain wash away all those fears. Let it rain until yesterday’s tears turned into tomorrow’s blooms. Let it rain until it rained no more.

He was going to take her out to dinner by candlelight in a fancy restaurant. She was so nervous she changed her outfit several times. She put her hair up, then down, then up again. She thought about topics for conversations. She imagined different scenarios. Would he hold her hand, look into her eyes or not like her and never ask her out again?

After dinner, they were going to see a movie. Would he snuggle up with her in the movie theater or be distant? Would they even make it to the movies or cut the date short? She looked at herself in the mirror, thinking how could a grown woman feel like a teenager on a first date? Relax, she said to herself. It’s just a stupid date, after a year of not dating.


She waited impatiently for the door bell to ring. But the phone rang instead. He was delayed and apologized profusely. Could they meet in front of the movie theater? She hesitated but gave him the benefit of the doubt and said yes. She grabbed her purse and umbrella and decided to walk in the rain. Maybe that would do her good. 

She browsed through some store windows. Valentine’s Day displays were already everywhere even though it was still January. There was so much pressure on this made-up holiday to be in love, to be with someone. So what if she would still be alone by then? She would survive. Yet she looked at the lit up heart in the window and sighed.

She arrived at the movie theater. It looked like it was crowded inside, typical for a Saturday night. She waited by the door as a car pulled up. It must be him. He got out of the car and walked towards another woman in the movie theater. No, it wasn’t him. She waited another 15 minutes, and then called him. No answer. Did she get stood up?


She decided she was going to the movies anyway. Alone. She went inside, bought a ticket and a small box of popcorn. No, make it a large one, she said to the cashier. She found a good seat in the back of the theater and watched the previews. A tear fell into the popcorn. She said to herself she wasn’t going to cry over a man ever again.

And then someone tapped on her shoulder …

who could it be this time,
the one to mend
or break her heart again?
~ ~ ~
This is a haibun, a combination of prose and haiku, shared with Poets United. It was inspired by a rainy night. I took the pictures in my hometown. To be continued ...

70 comments:

  1. i am hoping this is when she gets a pleasant surprise...maybe not him...maybe the one who she is intended....ha...its the romantic in me that does not want to give up on love....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True, Brian ... it could be the one she's intended to be with. Sometimes life works out best that way. Smiles :)

      Delete
  2. It was raining here too ~ I love the pictures & the story ~ I am an optimist so I am hoping things will turn out well for her ~ Happy Sunday ~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like your optimistic outlook, Grace. The rain makes me melancholic sometimes :)

      Delete
  3. Oh, this is so very sad. It is so hard to anticipate like this & then be disappointed. I hope that later on she heard that there was some good reason for his delay & that they met again. At least I am hopeful she will enjoy the movie & that if this man doesn't work out she will meet someone else who does!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, if anything, she will enjoy a good movie. I think it's brave to go out alone sometimes and not miss out on life. Smiles :)

      Delete
  4. I think this is a really hard form to work with, but you've done brilliantly.
    Ciao
    Pea

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Pea. I like writing a longer piece sometimes to develop a story line better ... and haibun is perfect for it, so I can still include a bit of poetry :)

      Delete
  5. Stood up is sure a mean thing to do, sad indeed. But could be him or could be the security asking for her ticket lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha, I just knew Pat
      would say that,
      but he could be cute
      and be her new date :)

      Delete
  6. Let's hope it's the one to mend...
    This is wonderful, Loredana.
    Happy Sunday to you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Lisa. It's been raining all weekend, and I was taking night photos in town. There are Valentine's displays in windows already, and the atmosphere inspired this little story. Happy Sunday to you, too :)

      Delete
  7. a story that weaved down many streets and then ended with a question..excellent write.. you got so much into this ... and then left me hanging which is hard on an old sloppy romantic like me... :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Robert ... yes, love is a question mark sometimes. You'll have to see what happens next. Smiles :)

      Delete
  8. I love this combination. Both stand alone, but, when paired together, go to a whole other level. I want her to be happy and I want her heart to be unbroken this time, Loredana. :) So perfectly penned!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for rhe encouragement, Kim. I didn't think they could stand alone, but I see that now. I love the haibun form, so versatile :)

      Delete
  9. I liked it a lot! I liked that you let me decide, and I like happy endings...no matter how it turned out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Annell. Glad you like that it's open ended ... the reader can make his or her own conclusion :)

      Delete
  10. I love the way you told this, and how at the end one is uncertain who the tap on the shoulder came from. Those last three lines are perfect. Great photos, too.

    ReplyDelete
  11. p.s. I most love that she went into the show anyway, and didnt go home. Yay!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Sherry. Yes, sometimes we have to make the best of a situation and move on with life. Smiles :)

      Delete
  12. I too hope that all is well with her! Somehow I didn't pick up on the fact that you write stories until now--where is my head??

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Audrey. Yes, I also write short stories or haibun, which ends with a haiku. Sometimes I just have more to say :)

      Delete
  13. I am with Sherry here. I like her attitude. It is good she decided to go to the movie anyway. And now you have left us hanging there. I hope we soon get to read about what happens to her/them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Gabriella ... yes, who knows what will happen. It's been nice to read the different reactions :)

      Delete
  14. Very interesting Loredana and not something I have come across before - especially the way you lead it all towards the essence of your haiku - which, of course exists in its own right and with its own opportunity of profundity - but also cleverly doubles up as a kind of 'stay tuned' message - excellent... With Best Wishes Scott www.scotthastie.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Scott. Yes, the story naturally led to the essence of the haiku ... finding true love is a journey with many disappointments on the way, which sometimes turn out to be blessings in disguise ... best to handle it all gracefully :)

      Delete
  15. Enjoyed pics and prose! Continued, or not continued, you captured the repetitive moves and nerves of getting ready for a date, the phone call and the walk. I loved that she treated herself to large popcorn. After that, whether he comes or not is just gravy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Susan. Yes, self-love is the key ... to feel fulfilled as an individual. Interesting to read how some think I should continue this, or that it stands on its own. Appreciate the observations :)

      Delete
  16. Replies
    1. Thank you, Michelle. I took the photos on a rainy night yesterday right in my hometown. The rain seems to inspire love stories :)

      Delete
  17. I was really drawn in by your words Loredana, I wanted to see what would happen next. I'm glad you will continue this story...

    ReplyDelete
  18. PS: Great photo too! Rain, especially at night is hard to capture well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Geraldine. Rain makes some really nice reflections and captures light well. Glad you enjoyed the story. Who knows what will happen next. It's a work in progress. Smiles :)

      Delete
  19. A terrible feel when one is stood up. There ought to be a good explanation. But it may open up opportunities for someone new and better! Nicely Loredana!

    Hank

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True, Hank. Sometimes things work out for the best :)

      Delete
  20. I thought the prose was a little long for a haibun but enjoyed it nevertheless particularly the question at the end. Glad my dating days are behind me...there are a lot of creeps out there and at some time or another I think I dated most of them:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your comment. Yes, traditional Japanese haibun is shorter and has nature imagery. Mine is a more contemporary version taking place in an urban setting. So yes, it's a bit longer. The conclusion is really open ended on purpose. It's interesting to see how everyone interprets what might have happened differently. It's all about individual perception and how we project our own personal experience into our interpretation :)

      Delete
  21. I wish he is the former one who mends the heart Loredana, beautiful write. :)

    Best wishes
    Ankita

    ReplyDelete
  22. Someday someone will walk into her life and make her realize why it never worked out with anyone else :)

    ReplyDelete
  23. What a great story. Left me hungry for more. I like the prose and poetic combination.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Myrna. I like the combination of prose and poetry, too. Glad this intrigued you :)

      Delete
  24. Nice cozy romantic story for the rainy weather...and you keep us guessing! Very intriguing...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmm, maybe there is a clue in the photos :)

      Delete
  25. It turned from rainy to snowy here. And freezing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's going to snow again this week! What will I write and photograph next? :)

      Delete
  26. Hmmm . . .The Jacob Burns Theater is a good place to forget about being stood up. I think it is a lucky prince from a far away land come to sweep you off your feet and you are going to make him wait until the film credits have finished.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow, you recognized the Jacob Burns Theatre. I'm impressed. Yes, she should make him wait until the movie is over. I like that! (This is a fictional story. Smiles :)

      Delete
  27. What a tear jerker. Well written.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. Yes, it's a little sad, but there is hope still :)

      Delete
  28. My heart is beating faster, I can't wait! Who is it?! I hope it's him with a good explanation!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Maybe it's him, maybe not. Stay tuned, Robyn. Smiles :)

      Delete
  29. Cara Loredana questo racconto è un gioiello,mosso da tanti sentimenti e con sorpresa...le foto sono così belle che fanno pensare a dei dipinti,la prima in particolare,sembra già dipinta!!! Complimenti anche per la sottile suspence che hai saputo creare!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cara Rita, grazie! Ogni tanto mi diverto a scrivere dei racconti che invento mentro vado in giro a fare foto! La prima e' proprio in citta' dove vivo di fronte al cinema. Cosi' ho pensato di raccontare un'incontro che forse avverra', forse no ... incerto come una scena di un film! Le foto di notte creano un'atmosfera misteriosa. Mi fa piacere che pensi che sembrano dipinti ... da te' e' un grande complimento. Abbraccio! :)

      Delete
  30. Oh I hope it's him! This makes me ache for her. I'm hoping for a happy ending!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How sweet, Tammy. Let's hope for a happy ending. Smiles :)

      Delete
  31. Ohh co’mon you cant leave it to us just like that… after having taken us down till the last line with the suspense still unwrapped, you twisted it all with another surprise package…

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your comment, Deeps. I had no idea this story would cause such a stir. Smiles :) Everyone really cares about this character and wants her to succeed. Or wants to know how it ends. The sequel is going to be interesting. Stay tuned :)

      Delete
  32. Loredana this was lovely...you captured the mood of a rainy night and a heart longing for companionship so well. Great Haiku too :) now waiting for the next part!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Aditi. Glad you liked it. I'm working on the next part. Smiles :)

      Delete
  33. Oh no, I was deep into the story...please make the continuation fast !!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Jane. I love your enthusiasm :)

      Delete
  34. You have seduced us...patiently awaiting the continuation...so many thoughts wandering of the "whos, whats"...and the "what ifs"... do tell!!! Aloha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aloha! Almost done ... been working on it all week. Thanks and hula-la !!!

      Delete
  35. Love your evocative pictures, Loredana, and your beautiful story. Can't wait for the next installment. So clever. P. x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for your sweet comment, Pam. My new post is finally up! :)

      Delete

Thank you for visiting my blog from all over the world and for your wonderful comments!